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  • Writer's pictureTash Sekar Goodman

Ways to actually *self-care* (without the cliches)

Updated: Apr 26, 2022

As it's Stress Awareness Month in April, I thought I would share the ways to self-care properly without the cliches.

For the last five years (or so), I've been a on a journey of self-development and re-parenting myself. Here is what I've learned:

Ways to *actually* take care of yourself:

1. Rest

The most fundamental way to practice self-love is to carve out time for rest. Rest can be productive, and rest can save you from burning out. If you haven’t blocked our periods of rest for yourself – then now is the time to begin. Yes, you sleep at night – but rest doesn’t just stop at that. Schedule a weekend of doing nothing, wind down, relax and just enjoy going with the flow and not really having much to do.

2. Listen to your gut instincts

It can be very easy to forget our inner voice, our gut instinct and completely ignore it. You don’t need to have all the answers to whatever it is in your life that you need more clarity on right now. Sit with it, pause, meditate, let it settle and things will become more clearer and make more sense as time passes.

3. Develop a self-care routine

A routine can keep you grounded. Whatever is happening n the world, your routine is a daily reminder that I have committed to care for yourself and your wellbeing. If you can commit to a routine, you can commit to other healthy habits. A routine can be as simple as

committing to a daily skincare, taking vitamins, meditation, drinking water in the morning. The simpler your routine is, the better.

4. Let go of limiting beliefs about relationships

We all romanticise relationships because of television, books, tv shows etc. However, no relationship is perfect, no relationship is without its faults and no relationship should carry on if it’s toxic and doesn’t add any value to your life. Your limiting belief could be that all your friendships and partnerships are perfect and you’re going to live happily ever after and never hit nay bumps on the road. Or maybe that limiting ideas is that you don’t deserve this kind of relationship from your friends or partners. Letting go of these limiting beliefs and find balance between the two that actually fits reality. Work through difficulties with people that want to work through it with you and let go of people that just want to take advantage of you.

5. Celebrate yourself

We’re all good at celebrating occasions like birthdays, anniversaries, weddings etc. But we aren’t very good at celebrating the small things. Celebrate the fact that you exercised for the first time in ages. Celebrate the fact that you spoke up in a situation that you previously wouldn’t have. Celebrate the fact that you upheld a boundary. Celebrate how you look today. Pamper yourself. Give yourself a bubble bath. Watch whatever trashy programmes make you feel good. Make yourself a meal/or order out. Do things that make you happy and celebrate the wonderful being that is you.

6. Reach out for help

Nobody should ever have to go through feeling depressed, anxious, o

verwhelmed, or helpless alone. We have people in our lives for a reason and human beings thrive off connection and social interaction. We fat too often think that other people don’t want to be bothered by our problems. In reality, we like to help each other. It’s been proven that it makes people happy to help each other out. If you prefer talking to a professional, there are many therapists/counsellors available to listen as well.

Have you got any other ways of looking after yourself?

Let me know in the comments below!

Tash x

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